the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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