Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
