Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize