is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize