why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
