wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
