We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
She bit a glass in half.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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