? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
