U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Randomize
