If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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