Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
