You're so nebulous sometimes
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize