But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize