well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
