I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
