why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize