just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
