I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
