Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
a search helicopter?!
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
