He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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