So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
