So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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