I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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