I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
