Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
My vagina just clenched in fear
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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