If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
