Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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