Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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