brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
