Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
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