I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
