you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize