All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
