I want to make a zoo with you.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
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