the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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