its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
