I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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