I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Randomize
