Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
