oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
