That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
