if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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