So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
