i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
handjob tips. give me some.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
