...so i touched it.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize