I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
