Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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