Buhtt sex?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Randomize
