Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
