Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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