I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
