About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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