Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
