Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I love you. Go after that dick
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
